Monday, February 25, 2013

Jello Sensory 'Sea'



I saw this idea on Pintrest, however the pin doesn't give any details on how to make it happen, and the process was quite a trial and error and error and error process. So here's my tips on how to make it happen.

I layered the jello over a couple days, and realized that I may have gone a little overboard, about 3-4 inches would have been sufficient. Oops.

I learned quickly that hot jello melts hot jello. Again, oops!

I used a dish basin, you can find them in the same aisle as the dish drain racks, and a bag of inexpensive bath toys, I decided on fish and therefore bought blue jello. The perfectionist in me then HAD to have blue jello, of course. Bad idea, really bad idea. My daughter looked like she had no blood flow to her hands for a while. One more time, oops.

I did two boxes at a time, so boil 4 cups of water, add 2 packets of jello, melt then add 4 cups of cold water and pour into the basin. Let it set up, then push the toys down into the jello. I suggest you then use the 'quick set' instructions for the next layer, this will ensure the jello doesn't melt and release the toys you just set.

I also suggest that you do this on a warm summer day, outside, with a garden hose near by. Or rinsing off in the sink works too.


More pictures ... because she's just too darn cute. *smile*










Saturday, February 23, 2013

Get your priorities crooked.

"You've been home all day, what have you done!"

Many, if not all, of you have heard this, or said it, at one time or another. I've said it, my husband has said it, I hear it from my friends. My husband and I get in to this discussion over and over. It baffles me, and those I know.

"I cleaned the whole house, what do you mean what have I done?"

Each of us thinks we've done
              everything,
                    and the other has done
                                     nothing.
                                                                We all know that's not possible.

So I got to thinking, if this is such a relevant and widespread issue, there has to be a simple reason and therefore a simple solution.

Then during a conversation with a friend, it hit me. There is a simple reason, and a {somewhat} simple solution.

Ready ... drum roll ... priorities. It all boils down to priorities.

The reason we feel the other didn't do anything, is because they didn't do anything on our list of priorities.

This pictures is a perfect example. My husband was so proud of himself that he had cleaned the bathroom while I was out. I went upstairs expecting an organized bathroom, things all put in their place and tidy. This is what I saw instead. I was immediately upset, thinking 'he didn't clean a thing!'

What had he done? The floor was mopped, the toilet clean, the sink and mirror wiped down. His priorities. Notice the toilet cleaner on the sink.

To him he had cleaned the bathroom because his priorities had been met. To me he had done nothing because mine had not.

In our busy lives of babies, school, work, and wanting to enjoy life, we can't get it all done. We know we can't get it all done, that's why we create this lists of priorities in the first place.

So what do you do to solve this recurring annoyance?

First, be aware that your priorities are rarely going to match those of your partner. That's actually good, it means that more stuff gets done. {You don't dust the mantel 15 times and never vacuum the floor.}

Ask your partner what they'd like you to do, and make them be specific. You may be surprised what's on the top of their list.

Start a monthly list. Make sure you both contribute your priorities to the list and whenever you have a minute complete a task. If your list is anything like ours, it will be clear what items you'll do versus your partner. This way both of your priorities get met. You both get your calm.

Keep the list simple and short, remember there's only 28-31 days to complete it, and you also have to do dishes and clothes in the between time. We keep ours to 10 or so a month.

So remember that you do both have different lists and that's okay, and not everything is going to be done, and that's okay. So do what you can, and appreciate and acknowledge what your partner has done.

And then snuggle and marvel at how well you've raised your children {or dog, or cat, or plants}, kept a home, and manage to still love each other.




*"Get your priorities crooked" is a direct quote from Mitch Hedberg. 

Monday, February 18, 2013

Why Formula Is Better.

This parenting gig is hard. 

There I said it.

It's not hard in the ways I expected; the sleepless nights, baby proofing, trips to the grocery store baby in toe, those are actually the easy part. It's hard in ways I didn't even think of.

You make decisions every day, every hour, every second that effect someone else's life ... forever. Some are small decisions, The pink pants or the blue ones, some are much larger, formula or breast milk. You ponder over them, you research them, you make them. You go through some trail and error, you figure out what works best for your family, your child, your sanity. And then you hope the decision you made was the best one.

I make those decisions, just like every other mom {and dad} out there. And I too hope they are the best ones. Before I had kids making those decisions was easy, you did what the books said was best, right?

{P.S. Sorry to everyone I ever gave parenting advice to before I had my own child, I had NO idea what I was talking about.}

As many of you know, some of the decisions we've made in our family have not been the popular decision. Does that mean I judge you, or think less of you because you've made a different decision for your family? No. 

I have found that no matter what decision you make, some one has something to say about it. Weekly Daily I have people telling me the decisions I'm making are not the best.

"She shouldn't be in your bed, it will ruin your marriage."
          "You're still breast feeding her? You're going to make her clingy."
                    "You can't pick her up every time she cries, she'll be okay, it's good for her."
                              "She's too young for table food, she'll choke on that."
                                        "Don't you have a hat for that child?"

I recently got an ear full for posting this article, that basically states the way we've been taught to parent for centuries may not be the best.

Again, in no way was this meant to 'bash', as it was stated, anyone else's parenting decisions. We're all in the same boat, we're all making decisions every second, we're all hoping for the best.

So why do I share these articles that state 'breast is best' and 'crying it out' may not be good and 'baby wearing' is good for your child, and so forth. I post them to help support other parents that have made similar decisions and are also hearing about how they're not the right decision. I have never, and will never say your decision is wrong. I am simply trying to combat the voices that speak so loud telling me my decisions are wrong with a little validation.

I expect each of you to do the same.

If you choose formula, I expect that you've thought about it, made a informed decision with no intent to hurt your child, a decision that is best for your family and you are helping to support other mothers that choose formula as well. And if that is the decision you've made, I too support you, because it's the best decision for your family. Do I think my child is smarter or better than yours {well of course because what mother would I be if I didn't}, no, not at all. I too was a formula baby, and it would be quite hypocritical of me wouldn't it?

That goes for any decision you've made.

So why the over abundance of breast feeding propaganda? Because, quite frankly, breast feeding has not been easy for us. Many of you have received the crying hysterical phone calls as I was so cracked and bleeding that I cried with every latch, as Madison stopped gaining weight and the 'F' word was thrown about, and many people, believing they were being supportive, urged me to quit. I did not, I pushed through and today, 10 months later, breast feeding has been the most rewarding thing I have accomplished. I want others to know they too can do it too, if they choose.

There are no bad parents {okay maybe the one that stuck her kid in the microwave}, we're all learning and trying and making errors as we go. We all want the best for our children. And we all want to hear every now and then that we're doing it right. I'm simply doing my part to tell the mom's out there that have made similar decisions I have that we {might} be doing it right. I expect the same from each and every one of you!

One day eggs are good for you and the next they're not, and you either choose to eat them or don't based on what's best for you. Why are each of these parenting decisions any different?

So go forth, great parents, keep making decisions, and keep marveling over how our children seem to grow, learn, and become little people in spite of because of us.

You are ALL great parents! 

Now can we please stop taking things personally and move forward and teach our wonderful children that there are many decisions to be made in life, and their friends may choose the red ball and not the blue one, but that's okay, we can still be friends.

Because no post would be complete without a picture of the reason.


Saturday, February 16, 2013

Fluoride - Not all it's cracked up to be

"Have you started giving her a fluoride supplement, 
we recommend that for all breastfeeding babies."

I have several issues with this statement, and it is one of the reasons we try not to see that practitioner any longer. We have choose not to give Madison any supplements, I'm a healthy woman with a well balanced diet, she's getting all the vitamins and minerals she needs from my milk. But today we're focused on one; Fluoride. Especially because when we stated that the CDC and WHO no longer recommended fluoride supplements, she looked at us in disbelief, like I had looked it up on Wikipedia.

Fluoride has beneficial effects on teeth at low concentrations in drinking-water, but excessive exposure to fluoride in drinking-water, or in combination with exposure to fluoride from other sources, can give rise to a number of adverse effects. - WHO, p2.


{From the start}

Okay, so here's why it's in your water in the first place. In some small town in Illinois, I think, in 1930 they found that there was an extremely low level of dental cares (cavities) and also a high level of fluoride in the water. Obviously then this 'fluoride' needs to be added to everyone's water. The didn't go far after that until recently, when the adverse effects of all this fluoride have been surfacing.

Fluoride is found in everything tooth related and not these days. Fluoride is naturally found in all water, sea water and lake/river water usually contain a low level, while the levels found in ground water can vary greatly based on the rock composition in the ground. Fluoride particles drift around in our air {in extremely low levels}. It's found on fruits in vegetables {also in very low levels}, taro, yams, and cassava beans have been found to have much higher levels, and although you levels in meats are also low, fluoride is stored in bones making fish and other meats canned with the bones {such is typical for salmon and sardines} lead to much higher levels. Wheat and barley also contain high levels, as well as tea leaves. How many of those things have you consumed lately?

So with all this naturally occurring fluoride, I ask you, Why add more to our water?

They think they're doing us a favor.

So what's the big issue, you ask? We over indulge is so many things these days, does a little extra fluoride really hurt anyone?

This recently published study has found that areas with higher fluoride levels also have children with lower IQs. The CDC has warned against the risk of dental fluorosis due to elevated exposure. Skeletal fluorosis can also occur because the fluoride interacts with calcium absorption. And in several studies, elevated fluoride exposure has been linked to cancer {but seriously, what hasn't been linked to cancer}. It is notable, however, that since the majority of fluoride is excreted through the kidneys, elevated levels may cause damage to the kidneys.

So let's review. If I give my kid fluoride she will have a lower chance of cavities BUT may have discolored and/or damaged teeth, brittle bones, cancer, kidney disease, and will be dumb. Please, sign me up for that one!

{Recommendations}

To be fair, there are areas where fluoride levels are extremely low and supplementation is recommended. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends supplementation ONLY if your local drinking water contains less that 0.3 ppm (parts per million) of fluoride. If you're on well water, you can have it tested, if you're using city/county water, a quick google search will usually turn up the information you're looking for {ensure you're using information from official sites, usually .gov}.


Alright, so yes your breasts do filter out the fluoride you take in, leaving very little given to your baby. My personal opinion, don't be a water snob. Use tap water in life. Let them drink from play with a sippy cup of tap water with every meal. Vary their diet. Cook their food with tap water. I'm sure we all use tap water for baths and if you're child is anything like mine they've drank their fair share of 'washcloth water'. Let them drink from the water hose. Let kids be kids and I think they'll turn out just fine.

____________________________________________________

{For more information}

World Health Organization http://www.who.int/water_sanitation_health/publications/fluoride_drinking_water_full.pdf

Center for Disease Control
http://www.cdc.gov/fluoridation/safety/dental_fluorosis.htm
http://www.cdc.gov/fluoridation/safety/infant_formula.htm

American Academy of Pediatrics
http://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/baby/feeding-nutrition/Pages/Fluoride-Supplements.aspx?nfstatus=401&nftoken=00000000-0000-0000-0000-000000000000&nfstatusdescription=ERROR%3a+No+local+token

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Co-sleeping vs Bed sharing, and why I'm for both.


I want to start with this simple statement:

Co-sleeping is not the same as bed sharing, and both can be safe.

Madison in her co sleeper.
Co-sleeping involves the child sleeping in the same 'space' as the parents. This 'space' encompasses the whole room. A child in their own crib feet from the parent's bed is still co-sleeping. And we all agree that a child in their own crib is safe, so we should all agree that co-sleeping is safe.

Bed sharing is just that, sharing a bed. Mom, Dad, Baby all pilled in the same bed. This too is safe, if done properly. Don't leave just yet, I know you've all heard about the handful of children that have died sharing a bed with their parents, I've heard it too. Please read again, if done properly.

So I hacked borrowed my husbands VCU Library account and typed 'infant bed sharing' in the search bar. I discovered one thing: you can make results look like whatever you want them to. But we all knew that didn't we? I mean 96% of all statistics are made up anyway, right? Or was it 89%?

The study published by Mosko, et al. Says it perfectly, 
"Normative values for infant sleep architecture have been established exclusively in the solitary sleeping environment."
 Just like our infant growth charts are based on white, formula fed babies. So when we base 'normal' on a very narrow subset of children, how do we really know what's abnormal? This study shows preferred sleep patterns in bed sharing infants. One study I read (that I'm sorry I do not have the reference to because reading it made me angry and I didn't think to save it.) says that bed sharing increases hypoxia in the infant, the fine print: who's head was covered. Well DUH!

What I was able to ascertain from all my reading was one thing: They just don't know.

A few things are clear, there are definitive risks. Bed sharing is discouraged when either parent has consumed alcohol or any narcotic medications, smokes, is overly tired, obese, or when there are other children in the bed. You also have to ensure you have a firm mattress and that there are no blankets, especially above the child's waist, all the same things you look for in a safe crib. I might add that the increase risk of SIDS was found only, yes only in a subset of smoking mothers. [2]

I have to point out one obvious point.

There is this video of a father crawling into the crib with his daughter, who falls asleep on him. I can't imagine a single person having an issue if this father happens to fall asleep in the crib with her, a much smaller space, why are we so in arms about this same situation happening in the parent's bed?

Again, I stress, when done properly.

So, let's address the other bit of statistics that people like to throw around, that mothers that bed share are less satisfied with parenting. I'm not really sure how you quantify parenting satisfaction, but I can tell you from experience that anxiety is always present with people ask how and where she sleeps. I have found few people in my life that are supportive of our sleep style. Finding a health care provider that is was the best thing that happened to us, and my biggest piece of advice if you too choose to bed share.

When I'm asked that question, that dreaded question, "How is she sleeping?" I have two options: {1} Tell the truth and prepare for the unsolicited advice on what should be going on or {2} Lie and go about my life. You have to wonder then, is this 'parenting dissatisfaction  really because of the sleeping arrangements, or because of the way they're forced to speak about it?

And to those of you who say it will ruin our marriage, I shake my head. If not having a few hours of time in bed together alone every night ruins our marriage, then I'm sure it wasn't that strong to begin with. 

Bed sharing will not ruin our marriage, it will strengthen our family!

Now that we've addressed all the disadvantages, let's talk about the {advantages}.

Studies have shown that bed sharing increases bonding between parents and children, facilities breast feeding {lets face it, who wants to get up and make and heat a bottle when you can whip out a boob, lying down, and go back to sleep}, and may even decrease SIDS due to the proximity of the mother increasing infant arousal leading to decreased time spent in deep sleep that can lead to decreased breathing in the infant. It is also believed that co sleeping leads to better self esteem and discipline in children. [4] And I can't help but to think it also decreases sleep problems. {Who doesn't remember being scared of the monster in the closet or under the bed? They don't live in mommy and daddy's room.}

Furthermore, co-sleeping is associated with lower infant cortisol levels, the hormone associated with stress. Elevated cortisol levels early in life are linked to many mental health disorders including schizophrenia, depression, and anxiety disorders. [1] 

Here's the skinny, don't do anything you wouldn't do in the child's crib. You wouldn't think to put a shirt filled with the smell of smoke in the crib, don't wear pj's to bed that do. You wouldn't place huge, bulky blankets in the crib, don't use then on your bed. You wouldn't place an intoxicated adult in their crib [although that is something I'd like to see], or another child, don't put then in your bed.

Do what works for you and your family. Know the risks and benefits, make an informed decision. 

___________________________________________

{References}

[1] Beijers, R, Riksen-Walraven JM, de Weerth C. Cortisol regulation in 12-month-old human infants: Associations with the infants early history of breastfeeding and co-sleeping. Stress. 2012 Nov 29. 

[2] Brenner, R. et al. Infant-Parent bed sharing in an inner-city population. Arch Pediatr Adolesc Med. 2003;157;33-39.

[3] Mosko, S., Richard, C., McKenna, J. Infant arousals during mother-infant bed sharing: Implications for infant sleep and suddent infant death syndrome research. Pediatrics 1997; 100; 841.

[4] Sobralske, M and Gruber, M. Risks and benefits of parent/child bed sharing. Journal of the American Acadamy of Nurse Practitioners. 21 (2009) 474-479.






Saturday, February 9, 2013

Cloth diapering full time

"You're doing what?!?"

We got that question a lot in the beginning. And then we got trickles of people asking if we liked it, does it work? Isn't it time consuming? The answers to many of these questions may surprise you.
Yes, we cloth diaper full time. In fact I am pretty confident there isn't a single disposable diaper in the house, and if there is one or two hiding in the dark corners, I'm sure it doesn't even come close to fitting her at this point.

Chillin' in the {clean} stash.
"Aren't they expensive?" Our entire stash ran us a little over $500, give or take a diaper or two. And I feel we have beyond recovered that in the 10 months we've been using cloth. When I say "stash" I'm including diapers, wet bags, diaper sprayer, the few cloth wipes we have (but don't really use), and any creams or such that we've acquired along the way.

Through our cloth diaper adventures, we have learned one thing to be true for everyone: Not all diapers are going to work for you like they do for someone else. Just like you may prefer J. Crew over Target, or Walmart over Macy's for clothing, diapers fit and wear different on every baby. Your best bet is to find a local store that will let you touch, feel, and try on a few different brands and styles.

That being said, here's how it works for us. Keep in mind our little girl was born 9 pounds 13 ounces and is now approximately 25 pounds at 10 months. She is a heavy wetter, breast fed and has chunky thighs.


{When We Started} 

Being born at close to 10 pounds, her size was never an issue. We started her on the cloth the second day after her last meconium poop. Some people start earlier and use liners. Part of the reason we didn't was because we were sent home from the hospital with a new pack of diapers, might was well use them, right?

{Diapers Themselves} See below for more explanation of the different styles.

First time in cloth, she looks confused.
For our everyday at home diaper, we choose a pocket diaper. (Fuzzibunz to be specific) It was quick to get on and off (a must for a squirmy baby), easy to show someone else how to use (no disposables for the babysitter), and cost effective. The lining that is against her bum is soft and stays dry to the touch, another must! Seriously, who wouldn't rather a soft cloth on their bum all day instead of chemicals and paper? {Count: 18}

We quickly found that night time needed another solution. She sleeps stays in her night diaper for approximately 12 hours. We use a bamboo pocket diaper for that (Blueberry makes a great one), it's super bulky and we therefore have a hard time finding pj's that work, but she wakes dry. Another down side of bamboo is that it lacks the 'stay dry' properties of some other materials, so we line them with a fleece liner. [More about these in a few.] {Count: 3}

When we're out and about it's another story. I found that packing enough pocket diapers for the day just overwhelmed my diaper bag so again we looked for another solution. An all-in-2 became our friend (we use Grovia's system). All-in-2's consist of a shell and a snap in inserts. To change the diaper you simply remove the insert and replace with a new one until the shell get's soiled (which rarely happens for us). Grovia's system is great in that the inserts come in cloth or disposable. We keep a mixture of both in he car just incase we're somewhere that cloth just isn't practical. {Count: 3 shells, 6 inserts, and a prefold}


{Storage and Washing}

We own 3 wet bags, 2 large and one small. The two large ones are our at home bags [one to use, one to wash]. We simply remove the liners and the whole diaper goes in the bag. The bag rarely smells, we add nothing to it, just leave it open [counter intuitive I know, but airing out the bag is the biggest help in eliminating odors].

Poop, you ask? Well, it was much nicer before solids I must say. Breastmilk poop can simply be washed, no rinsing necessary. Formula milk I believe you should rinse [don't quote me, another reason to breastfeed in my book, however]. Once you introduce solids ... well for us there was an in-between stage when it was part solid, part liquid. These we rinsed with a diaper sprayer. However, now that she's eating us out of house and home, we simply 'ploop' the poop in the toilet and keep moving.

Our wash routine goes something like this. [We have an older model top loading washer.] We use Planet, research your detergent, this is another thing that will vary family to family based on your water quality/composition. All you have to be sure of is that it doesn't contain brighteners or dyes/fragrances. These will build up and cause your diapers to repel water, not good when you're trying to contain it. We also use the extra large load setting, this ensures there's enough water to rinse thoroughly.

Rinse in cold water.
Wash in hot water with about a table spoon or so of powder detergent.
Extra rinse.
Dry on low for about an hour, or line dry.
 

Line drying is another cloth drying secret. It gets out ALL the stains, yes all of them! We wash about every 2-3 days, it takes no more time than washing and folding a load of clothes.

{Rash Treatments}

Truth be told, we've only had one rash that really needed treatment, but here's what we've learned over the months. First, using a cream with every diaper change is not necessary and even discouraged. [The in laws were not happy about this at first.] Cloth diapers allow more air to the skin and don't contain the irritating chemicals that promote rashes.

Coconut oil: Great everyday cream [useful in SOOOO many ways, moisturizes baby and momma]. This is a natural antibiotic and antifungal so it will help kill anything that may be growing. Just slather a bit on the bum.

Corn Starch: This is great at controlling excess moisture, but it is food for bugs that may be growing so use it with caution if a rash is present.


Creams: They do make a few cloth safe creams, California Baby makes a good one. Just be careful what you buy and know that any use of creams may void the diapers warranty.

Baking Soda: We have had one yeast infection, started as thrush and made it's way around. During this we learned this AH-MAZING trick. Using 1/3 box of baking soda in the tub during a bath will clear up just about anything. This is the only thing we use now. If we see even a hint of redness, baking soda goes in the bath and by morning she's nice and clear.

They also make great swim diapers, but remember chlorine will break them down faster, so keep one or two separate from your normal stash for swim only if you choose to use them.


{Tips and Money Savers}

Diaper retailers will try to sell you all kinds of extras, be sure it's something you will use before purchasing. Cloth wipes are one of these add-ons. Honestly, we intended to use them but they seemed more work than they were worth. BUT, if you do intend to use them, skip the expensive ones and make your own. You can get creative or, like I did, keep it simple. I purchased remnant fleece from the local craft store an cut it into strips [this is what we use for liners for our overnight diapers]. There's no sewing necessary, it doesn't unravel, after a few months of washing they may seem a little thin but still soft and absorbent.

My other best tip ever, if you have a chance to be a product tester, DO IT! Even if it costs a few bucks. If you don't like the product, there will probably be someone out there who does and will buy it or trade it after the testing period is over.

Just a side note: When I started thinking cloth, I saw this great all in one package, G Diapers. Look further into them before making the plunge.

Look around on Facebook and the internet for diaper swapping groups, these can save you a lot of money. Read lots of reviews. Like I said before, not every diaper works for every family.

____________________________________

{Types of diapers}

One size: Adjustable, made to fit a child for the majority of their diapering career.

Sized: Come in sizes, such as small, medium, large. Most are not adjustable other than the snaps and may not fit for long.

All-In-One: Just what they say, you take the whole diaper off and put a whole new one one. Pros: Easy to use, no taking a dirty diaper apart. Cons: Expensive and takes up a lot of room.

All-In-Two: Single shell with multiple lines Pros: Easy to adjust the absorption level, takes up less space. Cons: Can also be expensive.

Pocket: Use a shell with an insert that fits into a pocket. Pros: Easy to adjust absorption and easy to take on and off. Cons: Can take up a lot of space, and some can be bulky depending on how much of an insert you need to avoid leaks.

Flats & Prefolds: The 'old' cloth diaper, flat panel that is used with a shell or cover. Pros: very inexpensive, takes up the least amount of room. Cons: Can be quite messy and takes some practice to get the diaper on just right.

*Please note that this is in no way meant as a review of products,
but as a general guide to how cloth works for us*

Friday, February 8, 2013

Excess Lipase in Breastmilk

"Why does my milk taste bad?" 
               "Why won't my baby drink expressed milk?"

Feeding M at Maymont.
These two questions usually have one answer. Albeit a rare condition, excess lipase in breast milk does  happen. And it's happening to me. 

We had struggled to get my 3 month old to take a bottle for weeks. And finally found one that she would drink from, not choke and take more than half an ounce. So with a sigh of relief I returned to work, breast pump at the ready. 

Then 2 days back, it happened. I returned home from work one day, my husband very upset. "She won't drink any of this milk, and I tasted it, it's awful!" No it's not. I tasted it too, it's sweet tasting. What do you mean awful? So I gave it a try. 

I. Thought. I. Would. Vomit! It was awful, worse than awful. What was wrong with me? With my milk? So the research began. I googled everything and finally found what the problem may be, but solutions were much harder to come by. And that is why I'm sharing what I've found with you.

Lipase is an enzyme, that in breast milk  helps to digest the fats. One of the reasons breast milk is so perfect, it even helps to digest itself. In rare occasions, excess lipase causes a quick breakdown of fats causing the taste of the milk to change. It's not harmful, and if your little one will drink it, there's no issue. The issue lies when, like Madison, your little one refuses the milk.

If you're exclusively breastfeeding without bottles or pumping, you would never even know there was an issue. For most people the milk doesn't begin to turn until 24 hours or more after it's expressed, and a couple days if it's frozen. [For us, it's almost exactly 24 hours]. 

I've found the only solution is to scald your milk prior to freezing it. We do this on the stove with a thermometer. [My husband has assumed this role. Only fair, I pump, he "cooks" it. And has gotten so good he can do it by looks and no longer uses the thermometer.] Scalding can also be done in the microwave [but not recommended, see below] or with a bottle warmer. The bottle warmer is the best option if you need to do it at work. To scald, the milk must be at 160 degrees or greater for 15 seconds. Immediately cool it and bring to room temperature before freezing it. 

Won't this make the milk less nutritious you ask. Yes, sorta. It does changes the bacterial content of the milk and may breakdown some of the nutrients. They recommend this only if it is not the main source of the baby's milk. [So if you're exclusively pumping, give mainly fresh milk and keep the scalded stuff for backup.] 

To help slow the processes, be sure to rinse all your pumping parts and bottles with distilled water to remove any metals or water impurities. Metals and other impurities act as catalysts spreading the work of the lipase along. 

I remember being told that pineapple can help emulsify the fats, also slowing the processes. But I can't find any evidence of this and it made no change for me. In fact, many people have said that no diet changes had any effect. 

Our experience in a nut shell.

We've had great results with scalding. She only gets it 3 days a week while I'm at work. I pump and put it into a cooler bag and then [my husband] scald it all when I get home, cool it, and into the freezer. My 10 month old baby girl is a plump 24 pounds, walking, babbling and very active. She's had [knock on wood] one cold in her life. So it's working for us. Don't be discouraged, it can work for you to!

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*Microwaving milk has been said to kill the anti-infective properties of the milk, scalding or even pasteurizing keeps the anti-infective properties intact. Also, please remember that microwaved breast milk MUST be treated like formula when considering storage. 

References on microwaving human milk, sorry I don't have the links.

§  Sigman M, Burke KI, Swarner OW, Shavlik GW. Effects of microwaving human milk: changes in IgA content and bacterial count. J Am Diet Assoc. 1989 May;89(5):690-2. 

§  Quan R, Yang C, Rubinstein S, Lewiston NJ, Sunshine P, Stevenson DK, Kerner JA Jr. Effects of microwave radiation on anti-infective factors in human milk. Pediatrics. 1992 Apr;89(4 Pt 1):667-9. 


Oma giving me a bottle while Mommy's at work.

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Baby Led Weaning.

"She's never had any jar food?!"

Nope. Okay maybe a spoonful, but she wasn't a fan. Yes, Baby Led Weaning may be kind of a fad, but it has some real substance to it, don't leave just yet.

"When did you start her on pureed foods?" 
"Never, we went straight to table food, Baby Led Weaning." 
"You did what?"

That's usually how that conversation goes. So here's my explanation and how it worked for us in a nut shell.

Spaghetti. Yay!
First, the theory behind the fad. Breast milk (formula) should be a child's main source of nutrition for the first year, we can all agree on that. So this method allows the child to determine how much 'food' versus milk they take in in a single day.

So how does it work? Basically, you give the child {appropriate} table foods from the start. Her first taste of real food was avocado. Yes, it is messy, but it's fun!



Madison's first foods:
Avocado

Broccoli
Sweet potato
Apple 
Bananas
Green Beans 

Daddy gave me an apple!
There are a few things you have to let go.

First, you have no control over how much they eat {kind of the point} and even now at ten months, there are days Madison barely eats a thing, but she makes up with breast milk, and I have to take a breath and remind myself that she knows what she needs. It took a month or two before she was really taking in a good meal, but now you can't stop her most days.

Second, they will gag. Know that there is a difference in gagging and choking. She occasionally puts too much food in her mouth and gags, {knock on wood} she has not choked, however. The idea is to give them french fry sized pieces. I was scared, I cut hers into pea sized bites, I regret that now. Now we're having to work on taking bites and not just shoving the whole thing in her mouth. Did I mention she has 8, yes eight, teeth, and has for months now. Please continue to avoid common choking hazards. {Allergens are whole 'nother story. Truth be told, I wasn't good about avoid them myself. Doesn't help that there's evidence that supports early introduction as well as evidence to support delayed introduction. Consult your doctor if you have questions.}

Third, just forget trying to use a plate or place mat for a while. Just use the table, it cleans. Deep breaths. I know.

I feel Madison has benefited greatly from this. Having to pick up her own foods, she developed her hand-eye coordination quickly, as well as fine motor skills. It has helped build independence and because she's so excited that there are few foods she won't eat. In addition, she learns to only eat until she's full, not until the plate is empty. And maybe the best perk, you get to eat at the same time! No one has to feed the baby.

I did get quite the push back from family and friends that felt she needed rice cereal and pureed foods, but now that they see how well she does, the criticism has left us behind.

A list of things Madison will eat now ... 

Avocado
Apples
Pears
Prunes
Bananas 
Ravioli
Spaghetti
Beef
Pork
Chicken
Beats
Fish
Shrimp
Beans of All Types
Breads
Stew
Tofu

You get the point. 
In fact, the only things she won't eat are kidney beans and tomatoes. 

So go ahead, give them whatever you're eating. And no, this doesn't bread a generation of picky eaters and moms {dads} making two or three meals a night. In fact, if Madison doesn't like what we're eating, she doesn't eat. She may nurse instead or just go about her day. Some day's we're all more hungry than others, she won't starve if she doesn't eat lunch one day. 

So take a deep breath and let your child have fun. 
Meals should relaxing and fun, not stressful. 

{Useful tip} 
By a rice cooker or steamer of some sort. 
You can steam just about anything, and well steamed foods make a great start for those toothless mouths.

Helping clean up her mess.
{Yes an adult was in arms reach.}
What was your little one's first taste of food?

Friday, February 1, 2013

Never Say Never

This is the story of Madison's birth. I want to tell it for several reasons but most importantly, because when I was pregnant no one told me what a C. Section could be. All you hear is what it's not.

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The morning of March 22nd started like any other day. Got up, showered, searched my closet for something that would fit over my enormous belly. My husband was at work so my friend came with me to my weekly OB appointment. At my visit the week before [37 weeks] my belly was measuring 42 weeks so this weeks visit started with an ultrasound, just to "see what we're dealing with".

I had countless conversations with my OB over the last weeks about how I wanted our little girl's birthday to go. 

"No epidural."
           "No pain medications." 
                            "No Pit, I hear it just makes the pain worse."
                                                "Calm, quiet, natural."

I had a very clear view of how I wanted things to go, and a birth plan in hand. We prepared, we researched, we read book after book, blog after blog, article after article. [I warned you I research a lot.] We attended Bradley Birthing Classes. We knew what we wanted. We [thought] we knew all he latest research on everything.

So I went into the appointment thinking, "sure we'll do the ultrasound, we're still going to wait for Madison to decide her birthday." I was laying on the table, warm jell spread over my belly when I hear the tech, These things can be inaccurate because we can't get the whole baby in one picture." and then with a pause, "She may be 9 pounds. Probably 8 and a half. Maybe 8. Maybe 9." No wonder I was huge! No wonder my uterus was 'irritable' and I had been having contractions for weeks. No wonder! 9 POUNDS?!?! 

37 weeks.

Okay, we can handle this. That's big but ultrasounds are always wrong. Right?

So we waited to see the doctor. 9 pounds? 9 pounds? 9 POUNDS!? It was all I could think. So we sit down with Dr. T. I expected to hear that we'd wait and see, I expected to hear that she was sure Madison was closer to 8 pounds if that. Based on our previous conversations, I expected a lot of things. I did not expect what I heard.

"You look miserable and I'm affraid she's probably closer to 9 pounds. I think our best bet at a vaginal birth is induction."

Yes? No? Yes? No? Maybe?

So I went home and researched ... and researched. I looked up my chances of a C. Section based on my current status. Regular contractions, check. Dilated, 2 cm, check. Effaced, 70%, check. Looked like my chances are low. We talked, I researched, we talked, I researched. I was miserable. These contractions hurt! I asked many people for opinions, many said to wait, many others said to go ahead. In my heart I wanted to wait, but she was right, I was miserable. Four weeks of strong constant contractions was wearing on me.

So we scheduled the induction for 39 weeks.

March 29th, 2013. 

So I went in March 28th to stay overnight. Foley bulb to dilate my cervix a bit more failed, and HURT! So cervadil it was. Everyone that walked in the room had two things to say, "Can you feel these contractions?" and "Wow, you're big." Yes and thanks. Yes and thanks. I wanted it tattooed on my forehead. 

So the next morning they started the pitocin. Within hours we were at 5cm, totally effaced. Progressing well. Yay. And as a bonus, I found the contractions weren't nearly as bad as I had anticipated. 

10 hours later, my water had broken on it's own, but ... we were still at 5cm and she just wasn't going to drop any further. They said the dreaded words: Cesarean Section. I cried, I asked if there was any other options, I asked if we could wait longer. "Yes, I'll let you labor for days if you like, but I just don't believe she's going to be able to drop any further."

But then came the conversation I didn't expect.

"Do you want immediate skin to skin." Of course, is that an option? "We're going to make sure you're breastfeeding as soon as possible." Oh, okay. Maybe this isn't so bad?

Within hours I was draped, numb from the waist down and ready to go. Madison was out before I knew it, crying, as was I. She was checked over and placed on my chest while they finished and closed me up. Sure it involved surgery, but I had my first moments. Madison, my husband and I spent the first 30 minutes of her life together, as a family. Not torn apart in separate corners of the OR as I had imagined. And as I look back, she didn't know or care if mommy and daddy were wearing funny hats. I spent those minutes staring into her tiny face. Just the three of us. I could hear the doctors and nurses doing their jobs, and needed occasional help to keep her from falling of my chest. But those minutes were ours, minutes I didn't think would happen if she had to be removed via section. Minutes I will remember forever.

Immediately after Madison's birth.
So they finished with me, I handed our baby girl to daddy who escorted her back to our room, where I joined them shortly. And within an hour, Madison was latched and nursing, like a champ.

Daddy and Baby Girl.

Just after first nursing.

Was it the birthday I envisioned ... well yes. I labored without an epidural or pain medications for 10 hours, giving both of us the endorphins and hormones that come with labor. [Sure longer may have been better, but I'll take what I can get.]

She was born in an albeit bright room, but it was calm, our music playing, laughter and conversation, mom and dad by her side.

She was placed immediately on my chest for skin to skin, and was nursing within an hour.

She was alert, not druged. She was perfect!
 
I know what you're thinking. Was the ultrasound right? So at 38 weeks they thought she was around 8 and a half pounds. At 39 weeks ... 9 pounds 13 ounces. So yes, the ultrasound was pretty close.

Looking back, would I induce again?

No, but not because anything didn't go the way I wanted. More because I now know that a C. Section isn't the worse thing that can happen and will give an unmedicated vaginal birth the best try I have.

Given my current knowledge on due dates and development, I will let my next little one stay snug for as long as they're safe.

But know that just because you have to have a section, doesn't mean you have to give up those first few moments. 

And Madison's birthday was perfect!
 
 
So tell me, what did you not expect about your little one's birthday?